The Clorox Cocktail

Okay. I know these past few months have been tough. Being required to stay at home is no fun, even for someone like me who liked to practice social distancing long before it became fashionable.

And I guess for lack of anything better to do sales and consumption of beer, alcohol and wine are trending up. That’s understandable and even reasonable given the circumstances. I haven’t as yet heard any of the gasbags on MSNBC and elsewhere opine as to whether two fingers (or more) or Jameson served neat could serve as an antibody to protect against the virus. Oh well. I digress.

But as usual, perhaps I’m missing the big picture and not considering all the possibilities. Yesterday during his daily update/campaign rally, the bartender-in-chief, POTUS, added a new cocktail to the mix.

The Prez suggested that ingesting a disinfectant, like Clorox, could provide some relief to what ails many of us these days.

Folks, no matter how hard you try you can’t make this shit up.

Here’s from the BBC:

What did President Trump say?
During Thursday’s White House coronavirus task force briefing, an official presented the results of US government research that indicated coronavirus appeared to weaken faster when exposed to sunlight and heat.
The study also showed bleach could kill the virus in saliva or respiratory fluids within five minutes, and isopropyl alcohol could kill it even more quickly.
Mr Trump then hypothesised about the possibility of using a “tremendous ultraviolet” or “just very powerful light” on or even inside the body as a potential treatment.

“And then I see the disinfectant where it knocks it out in a minute. One minute,” he said. “And is there a way we can do something like that, by injection inside or almost a cleaning?
“Because you see it gets in the lungs and does a tremendous number on them, so it’d be interesting to check that,” he said.

Oh boy. I’ll have mine over ice please.

But wait. Manufacturers, health care professionals and others with a still functioning brain say not so fast.

Reckitt Benckiser, which owns Lysol and Dettol, said “under no circumstance” should its products be injected or ingested.
On Friday, Mr Trump said he had made the comments “sarcastically”.
Disinfectants are hazardous substances and can be poisonous if ingested.
Even external exposure can be dangerous to the skin, eyes and respiratory system.

Mr Trump’s comments have been heavily criticised by doctors and have generated a huge online response. They have provoked hundreds of thousands of comments and caused well-known cleaning brands to trend on social media.
Reckitt Benckiser, which also owns the brands Vanish and Cillit Bang, said its products should not be administered “through injection, ingestion or any other route”.
“Our disinfectant and hygiene products should only be used as intended and in line with usage guidelines. Please read the label and safety information,” the company said in a statement.

Hmmm. Maybe history does repeat itself. Remember 20 years ago when we could still buy toilet paper? At that time people had to be encouraged not to squeeze the Charmin.


Since I suspect that many Trump supporters will take his advice, it might be time to call Mr. Whipple out of retirement and add him to the Coronavirus Task Force. He could stand near Dr. Fauci and convey this simple message:

Please don’t drink the Clorox.



Published by

Rob Jewell

I’m Rob Jewell and I live and write in Woodland Park, Colorado, the City Above the Clouds. I've been fortunate. I worked for 29 years at BFGoodrich in Akron, Ohio. I started editing employee publications and ended as vice president of corporate communications. Then I started a public relations consulting company before becoming a full-time faculty member in the School of Journalism at Kent State University. I taught courses in writing, public relations and mass communication ethics. And I supervised a student-run public relations firm, called Flash Communications. During my tenure at Kent State I was honored to receive the university’s Outstanding Teaching Award. During most of this time I've been a dedicated runner. OK, jogger, if you take speed into consideration. But while my times are not much to write about, I was and am committed. For almost 30 years I ran at least 1,000 miles each year. (Except for one year when I tore my calf muscle playing tennis. So much for tennis.) Being on the road most mornings at 5 a.m. gave me some time to think. It also led to some amazing friendships that now span more than three decades. And my longtime love affair with running helped me shape my first novel, Then We Ran, which is available wherever electronic books are sold. And just so you don't think that all I did was work and run, I have other interests as well, many centering on family. My wife, Mary, was a successful and highly regarded career teacher in the Akron public schools. She now devotes her time and energy to a host of social and athletic activities in Woodland Park. My son, Brian, teaches at Cheyenne Mountain High School in Colorado Springs where he is also the head soccer coach. And my daughter, Jessica, has completed her doctorate at Kent State University where she is also an administrator with the Wick Poetry Center. I've done a lot of writing during my career -- but Jessica is the real writer in the family. I'll try not to make too many errors in this blog. I'm sure she'll be watching.

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